Trigger warning. This article mentions domestic violence. The US Hotline can be accessed via the nationwide number 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or TTY 1-800-787-3224 or 206 518 9361 (Video Phone Only for Deaf Callers). The Hotline provides service referrals to agencies in all 50 states, Puerto Rico, Guam and the U.S. Virgin Islands.
The film It Ends With Us hit theaters last August 2024 and arrived on Netflix on December 9th, 2024. The movie is closely inspired by the Colleen Hoover novel of the same name. Hoover’s novel is inspired by her personal story of her mother leaving her abusive father —a novel that portrays a story of domestic violence, trauma, and healing.
It Ends with Us is undeniably a powerful narrative that addresses the complexities of love, generational trauma, and personal growth. It is important to bring these stories to the big screen and tell more stories like these.
It is also important to highlight, however, that the portrayal of abuse, healing, and the romanticized elements of Lily’s relationships made it a controversial delivery. The tension between offering a story of empowerment and the risks of romanticizing toxic dynamics makes it a polarizing film.
Let’s unravel some of these controversies and discuss the important role that fashion played in this highly anticipated film starring Blake Lively and Justin Baldoni.
The Contentious Fashion
Costume design is a critical element of storytelling in films—it is acclaimed and recognized in the Academy Awards. It can elevate and illustrate each character's journey and “break the fourth wall” to engage with the audience and bring them a little bit closer. The risks, however, are for the clothes to be too distracting or misaligned with the story and take attention away from the stories being told on the screen.
For It Ends With Us, costume designer Eric Daman worked very closely with Blake Lively to curate outfits that came from thrift stores, Lively’s personal closet and even her husband, Ryan Reynolds closet. Daman worked with Lively during Gossip Girl, and there were several nods to the show and to Lively’s passion for fashion that made it to the final cut of the film.
There are the outstanding Yves Saint Laurent crystal mesh boots that Lily wears the first night she spends with Ryle, and the headbands as a nod to Blair Waldorf that are part of Alyssa’s outfits (her best friend in the film).
The bohemian mix-and-match aesthetic of Lily Bloom’s character was a little bit hard to follow for Lively’s fans. The internet broke with Lily Bloom's clothes after a paparazzi photo went viral several months before the movie was premiered. Lively is wearing wide-leg pants with tapestry, boxers, an oversized printed shirt, a cashmere crop tank, a mustard plastic leather jacket, and metallic brown shoes. Proportionately is off, visually it is saturated, and it seems as though the storytelling element of the outfit also missed the mark. The special occasion of Lily Bloom’s flower shop opening day could have been celebrated with a more cohesive outfit, one that the character knows how to pull off as we saw with her cocktail party dress look or even her camouflage printed looks.
Several pieces from Lily Bloom’s character are menswear vintage clothes meant to be boxy and almost aiming to shield her from the abuse that her mother suffered from her father.
Additionally, in a severely costly effort to follow the rich descriptions of the book, Alyssa wears an orange Birkin bag when she first meets Lily Bloom, and with a high-fashion irony, she wears an Oscar de la Renta coat with botanic elements printed all over, to tell Lily Bloom how much she hates flowers.
Controversy On the Script
Some critics believe that the film portrays a shallow depiction of abuse and healing. While the story showcases Lily’s decision to leave Ryle, it doesn’t go deeply into the physical, emotional, and psychological impact that abuse has on her; whereas in the real world, victims of domestic violence often face long-term effects including but not limited to PTSD, anxiety and depression. The relatively swift resolution of the conflict Lily Bloom faces in the movie was perceived by some viewers as a simplification of a very complex issue.
Additionally, the romanticization of the love triangle between Atlas, Ryle and Lily blurs the representation of leaving abusive relationships and healing with the idea of a knight with armor who is needed to rescue the victim should she need help. Although the portrayal of Atlas and Ryle in the film is very rich and well-founded to describe how two different men deal with generational trauma in distinct ways, it was important to emphasize and recognize that many victims of domestic violence don’t have an “Atlas” willing to have them in their apartment when they need to, but they still have resources and organizations to lean upon to ask for help.
Controversy Off the Script
The book It Ends With Us became a bestseller and a worldwide sensation. But the success has felt “bittersweet” for the author.
There are numerous conversations to be had about how to begin speaking about domestic violence in the first place. One that includes being sensitive to the subject, the triggers, previous and current experiences that spectators may be facing. The press tours must stop putting as a priority brand collaborations, and viral social media moments that make these conversations feel insensitive.
To push things further, the controversies have stretched out off the screen with a lawsuit from Blake Lively to Justin Baldoni for “retaliating against her for reporting sexual harassment and workplace safety concerns”. Specifically, Lively states that Baldoni had a “disturbing” and “unprofessional” behavior on set, with actions including entering her trailer uninvited while she was undressed when she was breastfeeding her child. She also accused Baldoni of sexual harassment and creating a smear campaign with his team against her to hurt her reputation so she would lose credibility.
Days later, Baldoni sued the New York Times for their report of the smear campaign against Blake Lively, accusing the outlet of "cowered to the wants and whims of two powerful 'untouchable' Hollywood elites" (though the newspaper stated the report was carefully sustained with evidence). Baldoni also accused Lively of using her influence to gain creative control of producing the film with a letter he was pressed to sign.
The mixed reactions amidst these allegations have shown how quick people can be to judge or overlook a victim if the victim is someone people don’t believe looks like a victim is too powerful to be a victim, or simply because the victim is not liked. These controversies on screen and off the screen leave us with the following questions to reflect.
What does a victim need to do in order to earn credibility, respect, and support from others?
If the law states that a person is proven innocent until proven guilty, why are we so quick to assume the worst of people but so skeptical in believing when someone said they have faced an injustice?
How can we further demystify the idea that a victim of domestic violence or harassment can be a person of any gender, age, or socioeconomic status?
How can we altogether trust each other to build a sense of community and help each other when needed and once and for all affirm that It Ends With Us?
